"So I think we own a boat" - Don Fierro

Hi there, I'm Al. Only my friends call me Al though. I barely know you people, so you can just call be "De Baron". I'm a salty, worldly, C&C Landfall Cutter, and I've got some questions for you wily punks who are claiming to "own" me. Let's get one thing straight. I own you! Now that that's clear, who are you and where do you think you're taking me? 

Braincloud: Hi Al! We're "Braincloud", and we're taking you to New Zealand over the course of 8-12 months!

De Baron: It's "De Baron" to you Braincloud! Nice name, hippies. Why not Moonbeam? Or Rainface? Ooh, I've heard some great things about New Zealand. Hobbits hang out there, right? 

BC: Don started a gmail account with this name many moons ago for the crew to share info. I guess he thinks we make a pretty cloud of brains. 6 brains, in fact, including one canine brain (Don's). Oh. Don tells me that it has something to do with Joe vs. the Volcano. I barely remember that movie! You're right, hobbits do hang out in NZ. But one escaped and is on our crew. His name is Andy. The hobbit community kicked him out about 10 years ago for being too tall and looking a bit like Keanu Reeves and Tom Cruise's love child. They're a jealous bunch. Basically, he wants to return to NZ with a burly braincloud to fight his way back into the community. 

Joe has a "brain cloud" which causes him to quit his job and go sailing. I get it now!

DB: Weird. Tell me more about this so-called crew.

BC: Well, Andy, aside from being an exiled hobbit, is our navigator. He likes to stare at weather reports and speak in the language of tradewinds. Carl is a lot like Charlie from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia. He's on board to do the Charlie work, which, in this case, is the electrical stuff. Good thing he's an electrical engineer and a mad scientist. Carl's dog Raleigh is an Australian shepherd. He's very cute and has blue eyes, like all of us except for Lisa. He's also a black belt in karate. Don is the savant-like lion cub mastermind of this crazy idea, but he also knows engines and mechanical stuff, so he's also doing the Charlie work. Lisa has brown eyes and can stare directly into the sun, and is therefore in charge of meals and provisioning. (Lisa interjects, "But my eyes are sun-sensitive! They aren't even useful brown eyes!") Great. So all of us will be cowering in the tropical sunlight. At least we'll be well fed by a trained chef. And I'm Leslie. I'm taking an Emergency Medical Training course with Andy and will be contributing emergency medic skills, so-so Spanish, cultural/medical/nutritional/ research, storytelling, activities planning, ice cream socials, etc. Just call me Julie from the Love Boat. You can read more about us in our bios on the "Crew" page.

Leslie sort of has this haircut already!

DB: Gawd. What a ramshackle group! So what's the route looking like? 

BC: What? You haven't clicked on the route button yet? I guess you are a boat and don't have fingers. Or toes. So we are leaving from San Diego by February 15th, then going to Baja, La Paz, to a wedding in Puerto Vallarta, Guatemala, El Salvador, Nicaragua, Cost Rica, The Galapagos Islands, Easter Island, Pitcairn Islands, Tahiti, and NZ! Boom! 

DB: Oh jeez. Well, I guess we'll be spending a lot of time together. Hurry up and get down to Sausalito! I need a good swabbing and some new bling. Let's go!

BC: Pretty soon, Al. We'll keep you posted on our movings and shakings on your deck. Don and Carl will be gutting you in about two weeks. You better start being nice to us!

And by that I mean Carl will be gutting the boat while Don kicks back.

DB: Ouch, be gentle! I'm very refined and sensitive. See you chuckleheads later!

BC: Aye-aye Al!